Maintaining a Healthy Same-Sex Relationship
Starting a new relationship can be scary. The first few months after meeting a romantic partner are typically packed with intense emotions and in-depth internal musings related to this person’s potential as your significant other. Of course, it doesn’t always become easier with time. For many same-sex couples, the struggle comes from understanding the best way to maintain a healthy relationship. Breaking the habits of being single can be tricky, but there are a number of useful steps to take for maintaining a healthy same-sex relationship.
Delete or Discuss the Apps
The internet has revolutionized the way most people go about dating. For the queer community, phone-based programs like Grindr and Tinder have become primary methods of communicating with potential partners. Interestingly, however, a number of people continue to use these applications even after a new relationship has begun. While it is normal for many, the decision to keep dating apps on your phone can be a point of contention. What’s important here is to define what these apps mean and why they haven’t been deleted.
Though there can be issues with monogamy in any relationship, statistics state that same-sex couples deal with the topic with more frequency. If you suspect your partner is still communicating with people on Grindr well into your relationship, talk about it. Some gay men use apps meant for dating or hookups as a way to meet gay friends. You don’t want to assume your partner is using the apps to cheat or get into trouble. Have a conversation, get to the heart of the issue, and discuss how you both feel about the problem at hand.
Testing Is Key
Before getting into a relationship, it is likely that you and your partner were both involved sexually with other partners. Accepting the past without jealously is a crucial step in establishing a new relationship. However, this does not mean outright ignoring the fact that you both were sexually active before meeting one another. Regular tests for STIs, especially during the beginning of the relationship, is absolutely necessary. Sexual health is just as important as any other aspect of your wellness. A failure to be tested can lead to far more damaging issues later.
Though it can be awkward, you want to have an open conversation about STIs and proper testing before your first sexual encounter. While plenty of couples neglect this, it should not be outright ignored for too long. Certain diseases and infections that are transmitted through intercourse can sit dormant in a system for years. Without a proper test to guarantee everything is fine, you or your partner could be passing an STI to the other. Thankfully, there are countless free clinics located around the country to help those who need to be tested.
Financial Matters
Not all new relationship advice is about sexual encounters. In fact, one of the more important topics to discuss with a partner early on is money. While most people feel like discussing finances can be a faux-pas when meeting a potential partner, you can’t ignore the issue forever. If the person you’re talking to has serious debt that will prevent him or her from making big life moves like marriage for many years, this is a point you want to be made aware of early. Keep the conversation light, and get a general idea of each other’s financial situations.
Entering a new relationship is as exciting as it is overwhelming. While you may want to get lost in the positive emotions that follow, you also need to discuss certain things early. Stay open in your approach to topics like sexual health, finances, and dating apps, and it can make a world of difference for maintaining a healthy same-sex relationship.